Day Two: 10 Likes and Dislikes

a/n: These are in NO particular order.

Likes:

1. Singing. The past year has been hard for me. Changing majors, no clue what my future has in store, not even sure if I'd be able to sing again like I love. I have tried to tell Singing, "Go away. Get a life. We're no longer friends." Singing didn't listen to me. It kept bothering me. It would show up in my car, the shower, the shows my friends are in that I wish I could be in. It wouldn't leave me the heck alone. Finally, we came face-to-Singing. We hugged it out and have been in love ever since. I'm only using Psychology to get my degree. Don't tell him that, though... he's been talking about maybe seeing a Psychiatrist about his problems...

2. Cats. I LOVE CATS. I do. I have a big baby and an annoying baby. Sassy is an 18 year old orange tabby. He's also a boy. When I was five years old, Homeward Bound was my favorite movie. I'd be damned if my cat's name wasn't going to be Sassy. Boy or not. Of course, we were also told by the woman that gave him to us that he was a girl. Vet kicked THAT in the pants when Sass was two. He's now mean, old, and senile. But still beautiful.

Then there's Jasper. Got him on a whim two years ago. And he's just plain OBNOXIOUS. (We're fighting right now, so I'm not posting anything sweet. Hmph).

3. I like Mt. Dew, but I have just recently had to tell him to take a hike because my new Weight Watcher friend does not approve. 

4. I like my friends. A lot. They keep me sane. And they love me for ME.

5. I know this is all "Things I like," but we're gonna make it "Things I LOVE." I LOVE my family. Especially these two...

6. I LOVE photography. I secretly wish that I'd actually be good at it. Along with affording a camera.

7. I like writing. 

8. I like to travel.

9. I like RAIN.

10. Absolute best for last. Jesus is my homeslice. He saved my life. I kind of love Him a LOT for that.

DISLIKES:

1. First and foremost - SPIDERS. And I refuse to post a picture of one of this terrifying monsters because I'll be too afraid to finish this post. I hate even the tiny ones. Because if your foot missed it and it gets away, WHERE DID IT GO?!? And then you sit in bed all night long, awake, with a blow torch in case the little [insert expletive here] comes back. Then your next day is screwed because you didn't sleep.

2. Mayonnaise. The very word makes me queezy. Also, I will not post a picture of this because I'll probably vomit and be unable to finish this post.

3. BAD GRAMMAR/SPELLING & IDIOCY. u know its not hard too type out all ur werds and capitalize when needed an act like youve ben to skool an know wat punctuation is. CUT IT OUT!

4. I hate Canadians. You can't trust them as far as you can throw the whole country. They're liars. They're lazy. They feed you those liar lies for three years until you finally wise up, thanks to friends with stalker tendencies, research this S.O.B. and find out they're not who they say they are. 

Ok, so maybe it's just one Canadian in particular. Because I really like Celine Dion.

5. Hot weather. I hate summer. I hate to sweat. I hate shorts. I look like a beached whale in them.

(Me in shorts below...)

6. I hate school.

7. I'm not a big fan of my job right now. Not saying I hate it. Not at all. I just...don't like it so much at the moment.

8. I hate it when people lie to me. 

9. I hate that I watch "Say Yes to the Dress" as much as I do. Sad business.

10. I hate that my mom and step-dad live so far away now!! WAH!!

THE END!!

Day One

I totally stole this from sweet Jenna LoserFace. ;) I have no muse lately, and this will get me up and writing again.

Basic things about myself... Hmm.

I'm a redheaded, Scotch-Irish kid. I just changed my major from Vocal Performance to Psychology. And I don't know when I'll EVER graduate. I also hate it when people ask me that question. I'm pro-grammar. I'm a pharmacy tech trying to decide if I actually like it or not. I have the bestest friends anyone could ever ask for, and a church family I love. Also a very large family-family that I love. Once I get my degree, I'm making my move to New York where I already have a voice teacher waiting for me. I'm hurrying, Gloria!! :)

I'm obsessed with Harry Potter.

I adore cats. Especially my own, Jasper.

And I'm a pretty big girl trying to find a guy that's happy with who I am, not what I am. In God's time.

Erm. I think that's about all.

**EDIT**

REWIND!!! Um, how could I forget the fact that I am impossibly terrified of spiders and mayo? HOW. COULD. I????

Just need to get this out...

"Keep it secret! Keep it safe!"

I'm sorry, but I don't think Gandalf was talking about friendship so much as a piece of jewelry. If you're going to pretend we're not friends with your other friends, then let's just save this whole "acting" crap, because things just hit the fan.

I don't understand people.

I don't understand YOU. You infuriate me. Yet it never lasts for more than a few seconds before we're fine again. What's so hard about telling people that? That we bicker constantly? Friends fight, you know. It's not completely out of the norm.

And yeah, we're fine again right now. But it still doesn't set well with me. I shouldn't be some secret. I don't intend to be some kind of threat. I mean, have you SEEN me?? Not threat material.

Be a man.

P.S. Congrats again on P-ing the Q.

All the Single Ladies

Okay, so I know I complain a lot about not having a significant other. About how the only "close to boyfriend" I had is now gay. And about how I've never been kissed. Oh, you haven't heard that? Well. Crawl out from under that rock.

Anyway, I'm actually glad I'm single. I think if I ever had a guy interested in me, I wouldn't know what to do. The thought freaks me out, quite honestly. I never dated as a teenager. No one was ever interested. So I don't know how to handle myself. I was thinking about this the other day, and it came to me:

Next to spiders, I am absolutely terrified of relationships.

Now, granted, I'm not making an excuse for the fact that I'm just not attractive or desirable. I'm pretty sure those are pretty good reasons I've never been in a relationship, also. But I also think I'd completely cop out if someone were to ever take interest in me. Because, like every other normal girl, I tend to catch myself day dreaming. What if I were in a relationship with this person? I'd think about it. And then completely scruntch my nose and move on. Like I'm better off without it.

It's so strange. I want, almost more than anything, to feel loved by a man, to be swept off my feet, to be so in love that I'm blinded by anything and everything bad in the world. But when I really think about it...it terrifies me.

Not to mention the fact that I want no part in the heart ache. Just getting my heart torn to pieces by guys I spill my heart out to is enough...but to be fully invested, to have actually spent time with a person, built a relationship, only to have it crumble? I can't imagine how that would make me feel. I don't even want to risk it.

And to even THINK about getting my first kiss? My God. HEAD FOR THE HILLS! RUN! DEAR GOD, SAVE THE CHILDREN!

Horrifying. I'm pretty sure that'd be one of the many things I'd eff up.

So, here's to being single. And to being content with it. There's a chance that God has a plan for me and my love life. But, you know, some people are meant to be alone. Not my first choice, but if it's the plan he has for me, then hey; I've got His Love. And that's all I should need.

Now, remind me of this next week when I'm all weepy, and I'll deny that I ever said such a thing. That's just the life of a normal girl.

I'm gonna finish school, move to New York, and then settle down with a nice Yankee. Yeah. No camoflage, no steel-toed boots, and no obnoxious, over-the-top southern accent. -sigh- Yeah. I'm sticking to that plan. :)

Suck. Suck. Suck.

Needless to say, things pretty much suck right now.

Okay, so, not so much "things" as work. Pretty much everything that COULD go wrong is happening to me or has happened to me while working there, and I'm just not sure I can handle this much pressure. Yeah. I'm saying I'm weak spirited. No one should go home crying after work because of work. Especially at least once a week. That's just ridiculous. I like most of the people. Others like to stir things up, which tends to make things worse in certain situations.

My mother wouldn't agree with me posting this, I wouldn't think. "People at work will see it." "It's not professional." You're right, Mom. But they already know what's going on. They know I'm miserable. And you know what? More than half of them hate being there, too.

Gigi's Cupcakes is hiring decorators. Do you know how much I would LOVE to have that job??? But, apparently, as my mother so delicately pointed out, I wouldn't learn as much or benefit as much from decorating cupcakes. I'd probably suck at that, too, anyway.

I'm probably going to state this in every post from now on, but I really miss my mom. This weekend she has been out of touch, working a church retreat where they can't have cell phones and stuff. Naturally, I've never needed to talk to her more.

In other news, I'm fat. I need to lose weight. Will you love me, then?

Frustration to an absurd degree.

That's where I am. I understand the fact that things can't all be perfect all the time. I was doing great. Things were going great. And I was an imbecile to think that Satan wouldn't get in the way of that and kill my high.

Because, you know, he did. Damn him to Hell.

I can say that. Because he's Satan.

I think what's really getting to me is that I just don't have time. For anything. Full time student with a "part time" job [part time my-], just moved [haven't unpacked a lick], and I'm just tired. Tired of making mistakes at work, tired of all of the stuff I have to remember to do for classes because there are 23,435 on-line components I have to remember about... I forget so much because I have SO MUCH on my mind. It's a terrifying place to be right now, my mind. Not that it always hasn't been, but now the little dudes that run around in there and control everything are drowning in the tears I don't have time to cry, thus causing everything to short circuit. It's wet and electric. And salty. Tears are salty.

And can I just say that I miss my mom? Not many girls are lucky enough to have the kind of relationship with their mom like I do with mine. She's one of my best friends. I can talk to her about anything. And I do. But she's so far away now, and sometimes phone calls aren't as good as hugs. What am I talking about... it's NEVER as good as hugs.

I'd rather not discuss the problems I've been having on Tuesday nights. Let's just say I'm making an appointment with my doctor sometime SOON to up my dosage on my xanax. And get something for my acid reflux, although I'm pretty sure it's flaring up lately because of my stress. That won't be going away anytime soon, so I might as well get a prescription. I'd continue to chug Maalox, but it doesn't help and tastes like nasty.

Time to work on Psychology notes. And diagnose myself.

Long time, no blog.

[Repeat title here].


It has been. Indeed. Lots of things have happened and whatnot since last I wrote.


1. Christmas.
2. I moved out.
3. The reality of being a Pharmacy Technician. 
4. Acid reflux on the kill.
5. School Started.


First things first, shall we?


1. Christmas was alright. Spent the night with my Grammy and cousin Megan on Christmas Eve. And, as any normal person should, we went to have Chinese to dinner for this Christmas Eve. No "Fa ra ra's" unfortunately. We made Megan order some sushi because she's never had it before. Kid wants to be a culinary chef one day... she HAS to at least try sushi! And she loved it, of course. The only person I've seen but a big wad of wasabi in her mouth and not catch on fire. She liked it. Our fortune cookies came out, and Grammy says "Alright, girls, let's see what we'll be doing under the bed sheets!"


Oh my gosh, I love her so much. 


Family breakfast was the next morning with Dad's side. Papaw ended up coming for the first time in years, but it wasn't long until he was carted off to the hospital. Heart problems and other "unknown" problems. He spent about a week there and now he's home. I should check to see how he's doing...


Mom's: Christmas in Destin with ALL the kids. My three nieces, my second cousin, and my nephew. They DO NOT get along when they're all together. Bert took his position as Colonel once more and had them on a morning schedule. You get up when he's ready to start breakfast, you eat, clean up your mess, then you fold up your blankets, sheets, put those and your pillows away. Reminds me of some White Christmas quotes. Except Bert was a Colonel, not a General.


"What do you do with a Colonel when he stops being a colonel?"


Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: I got along just fine without you in the Army. 
Emma Allen: Yeah. It only took 15,000 men to take my place.


But it was a good time. Christmas was nice. Got a new camera and money and whatnot. But I miss my mom. :( Happy Birthday today, Mom. :D


2. I moved out! And moved in with some friends of a friend. Except we're pretty much friends, now, so I moved in with friends. :] Jazzy likes it, and they like him, so it's all good. I have a LOT to do in my room, fixing up-wise. I like it. Mucho freedom...when I'm not working or at school... -_-


3. I don't even want to talk about this, because my 4. acid reflux will flare up again. Moving on...


4. Pain. Lots of Pain.


5. Well, it's school. But I think I'm going to like this semester. I'll never have free time, but...you know. It'll work out.


I'm tired of typing. I should write more often.